A Prayer for Owen Meany

Much was made of a New York Times article from a few years ago that compared the diets of two monkeys and their aging processes. "Canto," the monkey fed the healthy, low-calorie diet, was said to look noticeably healthier than his high-calorie diet counterpart, "Owen."

I don't know about you, but Owen looks like the bad boy of the pair to me. He's got a full head of hair, a piercing glare, and an expression that says: "don't mess with this." Canto, meanwhile, looks like a grade A mark. Just a thought.